Leaders, failure…now what?

billisaacs on July 14, 2008 | Filed Under Uncategorized

The story of Judas, Iscariot and Peter in the closing of the Gospels is compelling stuff when one considers how closely each of us are to both scenarios..betrayal and denial of the Savior. So, you don’t think you would? Neither did Peter and Judas! Maybe its just me but one of the issues constantly challenging my leadership mind is how failure is so close to all of us. In a moment of weakness, a moment when we let down our guard, a moment when we think we are stronger than we are…you know, as Paul describes, “let him who thinks he stands, take notice, lest he fall.”

You can check out a significant blog article from Tim Stevens here which punches me in the gut!

Another component is how we help others move from their failures to restoration. A good friend recently resigned his ministry due to an affair which had been going on for some time. I was stunned by the fact that I did not ever suspect it and yet I wonder if I might have helped my friend, had he asked. Why did he not ask?

As leaders in the church, we struggle to know how to help people who have “fumbled the ball” and in our hesitatancy, we can give the impression that we don’t care. But we do! So how do we enable others to rise again from the point of failure? What are the personal things I need to do, to say, to help me friend?

Post a comment and let’s strike a commitment to care more, to forgive quickly and to enable others to fulfill their God-given potential.

I’ll be looking for your comment.

Bishop Bill

12 Comments

David Boggs on July 15th, 2008

I think we have learned to forgive people at the same time we continue destroying them. Many times Leaders lack people in their lives they can really trust. I have heard, and experienced how leaders would share some issues to only have that Judas betray them and try to see their “BEST” friend destroyed all in the name of the Lord.

We have trained ourselves to keep everything on the inside and it causes us to began to live our temptation because we could not verbalize to a friend that could bring us back into reality.

We have to be trustworthy our friends in ministry needs us!

Kevin Walker on July 15th, 2008

“We have trained ourselves to keep everything on the inside and it causes us to began to live our temptation because we could not verbalize to a friend that could bring us back into reality.”

This is the truth. We need more genuine friendships in the ministry. So much is superficial now, and people (especially ministers) are so afraid of being judged that they shove all of their issues inside. And doing that is an open door for temptation and failure.

billisaacs on July 15th, 2008

David,

How can this be? Sounds like the woman in my father’s church years ago who said to him–I’ll forgive you but I won’t forget what you did!

Forgiveness means refusing to take action against or get any revenge. When we forgive, we give up our rights in order to restore anothers.

I’m concerned that we have not learned how to restore one another. There is an awkwardness in such times that often limits our conversation and that only adds to the problem.

billisaacs on July 15th, 2008

Kevin,

Do you think that our judgemental attitudes and things we say around others makes us know that we cannot be open and vulnerable with one another. Loose talk among leaders often creates hurdles we don’t realize because as I’m listening to you talk about another leader, I know, if given the chance, you will talk about me!

How do we get beyond this habit and create healing environments?

David Boggs on July 16th, 2008

Perhaps we should quit keeping score… When someone fails and forgiveness is given It should be over

Bobby Scott on July 16th, 2008

“Why didn’t he ask?”

They (and We) never do. It is the mask that we all put on. It is like believing that a weekly accountability group will keep you from straying; but if I can lie to God and my wife, I will have no problem lying to a circle of men.

Maybe the question is actually, “Why didn’t I ask?” Man, do we fall short on this one. We don’t want to impose and seem pushy or nosey. However, I believe that we need to be concentrating on relationships that give us the right to ask the sometimes seemingly random, yet heart-renching questions.

So,
“Are you ok?”

The Chief Shepherd : Leaders, failure… now what? on July 17th, 2008

[...] Link to the ForwardLeadership Blog Print This Post Posted in: Controversial, Ethics, Ministry Tags: betrayal, denial, failure, Iscariot, Judas, Leaders, Leadership, Tim Stevens [...]

Wesley Weatherford on July 17th, 2008

I have seen this up close and personal and to be honest I am not sure if there is anything anyone can do for the person falling, as far as keeping them from falling, because that person is making the decision no matter what you say or do, I think the responsibility is more on that person than anyone else to make sure that their character can uphold them. I do think if you know something is going on you can call that person out privately and try and hold them accountable as much as they will let you, I am not sure I think blowing the whistle on them is the right thing to do either. However once the failure has happened, I think there is a lot more we can do. I think we can do more to beef up the “Bogus” restoration process the COG has, from what I have heard it’s not restoration, it’s just punishment, there’s no real effort in restoration as much as it is the equivalent of a child getting put in time out. I think there’s more we can do as friends of people who have fallen, to truly show love and forgiveness and not throw stones… We say we forgive, and we say we don’t judge… We say things like, “yea it could have happened to any of us…” “he made a mistake he’s still a good guy” but we outcast those who make the mistake instead of embracing them when they need us most. We don’t call, and those who do call are looking for a story to tell at the next minsters meeting or camp meeting. It’s like you’re kicked out of the club, you were real cool to have around, and we liked your ideas, and you were this and that, but now you can’t be in our club anymore.

YEA WE CAN DEFINITELY DO MORE!!!

billisaacs on July 17th, 2008

Wesley,
Because I know of a situation close to you, your words are very important to the dialogue going on here.

Restoration is not easy for anyone, especially the OFFENDER. He/She has lost more than imagined and the challenge of keeping professional relationships intact is made more difficult by the separation of not seeing the person at events, outings, etc. So, we have to be more intentional in our actions.

Look for more on this subject in tomorrow’s blog post…

billisaacs.org » Blog Archive » Restoring our brother/sister…do we really mean it? on July 17th, 2008

[...] Weatherford posted this today and it caused me to think about the need for INTENTIONALITY in restoration of our fallen [...]

The Chief Shepherd : Restoring our brother/sister…do we really mean it? on August 2nd, 2008

[...] Weatherford posted this today and it caused me to think about the need for INTENTIONALITY in restoration of our fallen [...]

Leaders, failure… now what? | Chief Shepherd on February 3rd, 2010

[...] Link to the ForwardLeadership Blog linkscolor = “330099″; highlightscolor = “FF0000″; backgroundcolor = “FFFFFF”; channel = “none”; About Bill:Bishop Bill Isaacs continues to post his thoughts on his Forward Leadership Blog. Bill & I have had a deep friendship for several years. He joined me in my second missions trip to Africa where we ministered to hundreds of people in Uganda and D.R. Congo. Bill currently serves as Administrative Bishop of the Churches of God in Northern Ohio and also on the Council of 18 for the Church of God, Cleveland, Tennessee. Share EthicsCan The Church Learn From Domino’s Pizza?Uniformity of Understanding?The Fuzzy-Wuzzy World of Charismatic MoralityScandal in the churchMinisterally Speaking; and the Southern BaptistLeaders, failure… now what? This entry is part 6 in the series “Ethics”. Click on the title to read this entire article. Check the “SERIES” item in the right-hand column to read more from this series. Other articles will likely follow periodically. Check back often to read everything.To add your comments, click on the “comments” button in the menu line at the bottom of this article.Series Navigation«Ministerally Speaking; and the Southern BaptistHello there! If you are new here, you might want to subscribe to the RSS feed for updates on this topic.Powered by WP Greet Box WordPress Plugin betrayal, denial, failure, Iscariot, Judas, Leaders, Leadership, Tim Stevens blog comments powered by Disqus var disqus_url = ‘http://chiefshepherd.com/2008/07/failure/ ‘; var disqus_container_id = ‘disqus_thread’; var facebookXdReceiverPath = ‘http://chiefshepherd.com/wp-content/plugins/disqus-comment-system/xd_receiver.htm’; var DsqLocal = { ‘trackbacks’: [ ], ‘trackback_url’: ‘http://chiefshepherd.com/2008/07/failure/trackback/’ }; RSS feed for this post (comments) Page Visits1» wp.com stats helper Chief Shepherd Chief Shepherd [...]